another confession

As we trick-or-treated last night, I was constantly reminding the boys to say "thank you" after they received candy. Sometimes they would do it without prompting but they would often forget. It was a good reminder that gratitude is not something that we are born with. It is a trait that needs to be cultivated. I can say with certainty that my kids' natural instinct is expectation, not gratitude. Just think of how a child responds at Christmas time or a birthday when the last gift has been opened. It isn't with, "Thank you so much for everything." Instead, they usually ask what else there is for them and are quite disappointed to learn that there isn't any more.
I want to cultivate gratitude in my kids. Unfortunately, I realize that it is something I struggle with myself. I've learned to say thank you and to not voice my expectations, but that doesn't mean that I don't have times of wanting to say, "What else is there? Isn't there anything more?" And it extends beyond material things. I look at my life and I say to God, "Is this it? I mean this is great and all but I was kind of hoping for..." Again, gratitude is not a natural state. It's something that has to be worked at.
It is humbling to know that I still struggle with some of the same things that my five and three year old struggle with. But, at the same time, I know that my story isn't done yet and that I can still continue to grow and change. And I'm thankful that God allows me to see myself in my kids, that He makes me aware of my shortcomings because it means that He loves me enough to want better for me.
So, to give me some practice, today I'm thankful for the following five things:
1. Dinner with my mom
2. Playing dominos with Jem
3. Halloween candy (chocolate)
4. The way my little girl smiles at me
5. Getting a sticker from Jem for being a "nice" mommy

photo by: chrisinplymouth  http://www.flickr.com/photos/chrisinplymouth/3556625492/