On Wednesday when I dropped Jem off at preschool there were a few new toys out, one of which was a pirate ship. The boys have just started watching Jake and the Pirates on Disney and we often spend our lunch times pretending that we are on a ship. I'm Captain Mommy and they are my crew. So I was excited to see a pirate ship toy until one of the little girls playing with it looked up and screamed, "No, Jem. You can't play with this."
This is the same little girl who used to come up to me last year and tell me that Truett wasn't allowed to play with toys and that he needed to leave with me. I did my best to reply in a gentle tone of voice, assuring her that it was okay and that he would be coming with me as soon as I left. Really I wanted to tell her to mind her own business and that she wasn't the boss.
And now she is standing there yelling at my kid, telling him that he can't play with something. That he isn't wanted. And I wanted to walk across the room and get in her face. To tell her that she has no say over who plays with what toy and that my boy will play with any toy that he wants and she had better just shut her bossy little mouth. Thankfully the teacher stepped in and corrected her and I was saved from dealing with the situation.
It was a reminder that this is coming sooner than I think. My children are going to come home from school or birthday parties or sunday school and they are going to be upset. They will tell me that so-and-so wouldn't play with them or that someone made fun of them. And I won't be allowed to physically harm those kids but I will probably think about it. How can you not want to hurt someone who hurts your children? But the only thing I'll be able to do is dry their tears and hopefully use the hurt to teach them about compassion and kindness. At least, that is my plan and it seems a little more reasonable than yelling at little kids.