truett's trail

Tru has always been a little bit doppy. Until just recently, he had a tendency to fall down a lot. He is one of those kids who runs while looking at stuff all around him rather than his destination. He once drove a friends kid-sized four-wheeler into the broad side of their very large shed, simply because he was looking down at his feet instead of in front of him.
Now the doppiness is mixing in with the impulsiveness and creating quite a few messes. A few nights ago he decided to throw a pillow into the air while he was watching shows. He can't throw it up and catch it so of course it went careening into the end table and knocked over a glass of ice water.
Today at lunch he wanted to know what kind of chips were on the counter. The impulsiveness means that he couldn't just ask. He had to touch it and lift it up. And the doppiness or lack of concentration means that the bag ended up on the floor, chips spilling everywhere. This was followed by a half-eaten strawberry that was dropped on his Oma's beige carpet and a bowl of m&m's that went tumbling off of the table because he can't sit in his seat without wiggling around.
This is another one of those places where I'm stuck. I'm trying to figure out how to curb the impulsiveness without destroying the inquisitiveness. I want him to be curious about things and to explore. I just wish he could do it without leaving a trail of destruction behind him.

photo from:  www.come-over.to -  

dinner fail

I like to try new things for dinner. I guess it would be easier to just have the same thing but I like to cook and I like to experiment with new recipes. So while I do have my staples, I also like to try something new at least one night a week, if not more. Most of the time, it pays off and we have a new dinner to add to the recipe book. Sometimes though it doesn't go well at all.
Last night was one of those nights. I decided to try a new recipe from one of my go-to recipe sites. It called for 2 cups of fresh Parmesan cheese. Normally, I would just throw in the generic stuff, because $6 for a wedge of cheese is a little salty for me. But I wanted to stick to the recipe, especially on the first try so I asked Sam to pick up some real Parmesan for me.
My first clue to the possibility that dinner might not be a hit came while I was shredding the cheese. I don't know what is done to the generic, shake-it-out-of-the-jar stuff but real Parmesan is kind of, well, stinky. If you don't believe me, just ask Truett. He came into the kitchen after I was finished grating and demanded to know what the horrible smell was. "Ugh! Mom! Ugh! What is that?! Ewww!!" And he doubled over with his hands over his nose and ran from the room.
That was followed by Sam coming home from work and asking me what the smell was. I told him it was the cheese and he responded with, "Oh, I thought maybe somebody threw up today." And the sad part was that he was right. It did smell like that. And our dinner was covered in it.
Thankfully, it didn't taste like it smelled. There was still a bite from the cheese but nothing compared to the smell. The one silver lining to the whole thing was that the boys came into the kitchen for dinner, took one smell, and ran off. And for once, Sam and I didn't call them back. We just sat down and enjoyed a quiet dinner by ourselves. The boys eventually returned and each ate three bites (Jem cried the entire time and gagged it down with water) and then had a bowl of cereal. I guess fresh Parmesan is an acquired taste, one that we aren't ready for yet.

i'm the best

Over the past few days, Jem has experienced a surge in confidence. It started out with his lego- building skills. And this morning, while we were coloring at the table, it progressed to include coloring, playing computer games, and cutting things out. In Jem's own words, "I'm the best at all of that stuff."
So now I'm in this quandary of how to handle this. I want my kids to be confident. I want them to have some pride in the things that they work hard for and achieve. But confidence can so easily tip over into arrogance and I definitely don't want that. How do I teach my kids to be confident, to acknowledge their abilities, without bragging or being prideful?
One option could be telling him that he really isn't the best at all of those things but that didn't seem like the way to go. Instead, I tried to temper his bragging in two ways. First, I asked him if he could name some things that Truett was really good at. I thought that thinking of other people's gifts might help take the self-love down a little bit. He wasn't able to come up with anything that Tru was good at. Not surprising.
So then I thought I would ask him to name a few things that he wasn't as good at, things that maybe he needed to work on or practice some more. I was thinking of actual activities, like swinging a bat at a ball or recognizing sight words. He thought I was asking about behavioral things and told me that he could work on being a better listener. (Right answer, wrong time)
Eventually, I just let it go and reminded both boys to only say things that they would want someone to say to them. If it continues, then I guess we will have to have a chat about bragging. Until then, I will just have to hope that he only feels confident enough to say stuff like that at home.

sunday school according to Jem

It is Monday, which means it is time for the next installment of Sunday School According to Jem. Enjoy!

Me: So Jem, what did you learn about today in Sunday School?
Jem: Um...I don't know.
Truett: Let me tell you Mom. There was a guy with legs that didn't work. He couldn't dance or jump a rope.
Jem: Oh yeah. And he went to this church place and asked people for money. Sometimes they gave him some and sometimes they didn't. And Jesus' really good helpers walked by him and they didn't give him any money but they said that he should talk to Jesus.
Sam: So what did Jesus do?
Jem: He gave him a new set of legs!
Tru: He healed him!
Jem: Yeah, Jesus made the legs and put them on the kid and then he could do everything. He could dance, jump rope and bounce up and down. See? I made my guy with bouncy legs. And a sunburn.

he wants to be an artist

On Tuesday, as Jem and I were heading into the playroom, he said, "Maybe I'll be an artist when I grow up Mommy." I replied by telling him that sounded like a great idea and we continued on with our play.
However...inside I was not all about the artist thing. It was like some old woman had risen up in me shouting all sorts of things like:
~that's a hobby, not a career

~you'd better have a back-up plan

~I hope you don't think you're living here when you're in your thirties

~wouldn't you like to be something steady and dependable, like an accountant

~hippie!

Thankfully, I was able to wrangle the old gal and keep quiet. Yes, I know the practical difficulties of being an artist. There are a lot of career paths out there that come with difficulty and don't really lend themselves to finding steady employment. But I also know that there are a lot of years between now and the time when Jem needs to worry about supporting himself. A lot of years before he will decide a career path. So the logical, pessimistic arguments can wait. For now, I can let my boy dream.

i'll show you

This morning at breakfast, Truett decided that he wanted to sit at our little, two-seater cafe table with me and leave Jem alone at the bar. Jem, of course, didn't like the idea of eating by himself, even though we were all still in the same room. So to avoid a meltdown by either one, I explained to them that Tru could eat at the table for breakfast and then Jem could eat at the table during lunch time. And I explained that I didn't want to have any whining or arguing about it. This was mostly directed at Tru and he knew it. He looked up from his oatmeal and said, "I'm going to sit down at the bar for lunch and I'm not going to cry and I'm going to listen to you." Pretty cool, right? Except for the fact that he said it in a threatening tone with his eyebrows lowered and his shoulders hunched. It is the same tone and posture that he uses when he is threatening to throw something. It was a weird moment to realize that he was threatening me with good behavior. Almost as if he was trying to defy me to believe that he could ever be angry or misbehave.
I looked at him and asked, "Are you threatening me with good behavior", to which he calmly replied, "Yes. I am".

a big bowl of awful

One of my challenges this month is eating better. I met with a nutritionist at the beginning of the month to help get me started on the right track. I'm doing my best to stick to my approved foods but it hasn't been super easy.
One of my approved snacks is a serving of plain greek yogurt with some added fruit. I decided to give it a shot today during my morning snack time. Jem sat down at the bar with his bowl of normal, flavored yogurt and I sat down with  my bowl of plain greek yogurt with some banana slices in it. It looked suspiciously like sour cream and I said so jokingly to Jem. Then I tasted it and realized the resemblance to sour cream didn't just start and stop with appearance. I looked at the container and compared it to my container of sour cream. Do you know what the difference is? Active yogurt cultures. That's it. And let me tell you, those active yogurt cultures do not alter the taste. Yuck! Maybe it is because I am used to yogurt that tastes like peaches or strawberries. Maybe it is because I file yogurt under "sweet snacks" in my brain. Maybe it is because I don't want to eat a bowl of something that I could top a baked potato with. Whatever the reason, I am not into plain yogurt. I had to add some honey to it just to get it down and I'm sure that is not on my approved list of foods. Oh well. I bet I can use it in place of sour cream to make sour cream pancakes. And those get covered with butter and warm, syrupy syrup. Yum! Also not on my approved list of foods. But at least I'm eating my yogurt, right? Right?!